The 8 Commandments of Mom: How to Mom Politely


Judge

 

 

 

 

New mom? Veteran mom? Either way how you mom, we’ve all broken a couple of these commandments every now and then. Myself included.

1.Thou shall not judge.

jlaw

 

 

 

 

Whether your baby is breast feed vs. bottle fed, gets organic vs. non organic food, is given homemade baby food vs. non homemade baby food, wears cloth diapers vs. regular diapers, let’s not pretend we get a medal for doing one or the other.

Parenting is like making macaroni art in kindergarten, you work with what you got, you try to have fun, and make something pretty in the process. Let’s not judge our fellow classmates’s work or the artist.

2.Thou shall not brag.

brag

Your kid is sleeping through the night. That’s awesome. I am happy for you, but that doesn’t make you look like an awesome parent. FYI. It makes you look like a jerk.

If your kid is sleeping through the night, I warn you, I REPEAT, I warn you, do not disclose it publicly. Because the minute you do, your kid will go through a sleep regression. I broke this rule with kid no.1. There was hell to pay. Don’t be like this Laura.

3.Thou shall not plan

pink

Whatever you got planned for the day, you might as well put ” ” those around it, because it may or may not happen. Make sure friends and families understand this. Plans can and may change depending on the accommodation of your children. I get so frustrated when the plans I make don’t happen, because I am a planner. But it’s okay. (I am telling this more to myself than to you guys.)Do what you can, not what you plan. This is my motto.

4.Thou shall complain

friends

Seriously. Complain. We are all in this together. I don’t care if people tell you that you can’t complain, because you should love your child(ren) every second of your existence. Yes, you are lucky to have your kid(s). But, that doesn’t mean you have to be so friggin happy about it all the time. Sometimes your kid(s) raise(s) hell. And, sometimes you need to too.

Complaining makes you look human. I don’t care what their Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest,#blessed says. No parent is perfectly happy all the time. And any parent who is, sits on a throne of lies.

5.Thou shall help

boy meets world

Do you know of a mom who is struggling? Is she having a hard time adjusting or maybe her baby is going through something? Be there for her. It takes a village to raise a child and it takes a village to help a mom.

6.Thou shall not be an evangelical mom

evangelical

You need to attachment parent. You need to let your baby cry it out.  PfftIf there’s one thing I learned from kid no.1 to kid no.2 is that there is no blanket method for how to raise a child. Each child will require improvisational parenting. So, what works for your kid, may not be the best method for your friend’s kid or your next kid. Therefore, don’t spread the gospel of your mom-ness, unless another mom wants to know about your gospel. I’ve been guilty of this 😦 Sorry guys. 

7.Thou shall understand

sweat pants

Moms. This goes to you: “I got my body back after baby.” “Look how awesome my body looks.” “I barely gained any weight.” Vomit!

I am a testament to the cruelty of mother nature.

When I was pregnant with my son, I gained 7o lbs. I ate nothing but salads. By the end of every day I was so swollen. No matter how hard I tried I could not reverse the chaos that was happening in my body. It took me forever to lose the baby weight.

With my daughter, I ate nothing but salads. I gained 30 lbs. And I am much happier with my post weight regression than with my son.

Moral of the story, you can’t control mother nature. You can work with her, but you can not work against her.

You have to be patient with your body. You are on your own journey of wellness. Like Yoga, you have to focus on your own practice. If you start looking at everyone else, where they are at, and what they are doing, you lose your balance, and you fall out of the pose. Don’t fall out of the pose.

Every time you beat yourself up, just remember, your body, this incredible amazing thing that functions on it’s own, CREATED A HUMAN BEING. Let’s just think about that for a second: your body created a human being.That’s like some freaky sci-fi crap right there!  :::mind blown:::

8.Thou shall love yourself

pretty

Being a mom is hard. Give yourself a break. There is no such thing as a perfect mom.

So, be healthy and love yourself. You are amazing! You can do this!

Now go, and spread the gospel of polite mom-ing.

 


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